new to site
i am a mother of 4 great kids which i have lost to my mother, which were legally adopted yesterday on jul.27. my husband and i used together and really didnt start using until our youngest son was diagnosed with cancer in jan. 2003 on super bowl sunday. my husband lost total control and i lost it when the cancer came back a year later. i lost everything, my husband,my home,my children, my whole entire family and it is very hard to stay clean (4 mos AGAIN). dhs wasnt able to help with anything, housing and always downing me when i did everything that was asked of me, completed groups,meetings,rehab all succesfully, but i had no job,no help for transportation, and no stable housing. they refused to help with housing. i live in clinton and their is nothing here, i go to couseling, take my meds but no suppport for moms like me. their are few here in clinton that have lost their kids like i have. i feel real alone, no friends, no family, no support. i have been online for 2 days trying to find a support group for moms like myself, i do still get to see my kids when it is convienent for my mom. i am lucky on that aspect, but i still miss them greatly and still have overwhelming guilt that i cant seem to get over. they have come so far and i am so proud of them. i am tired of being miserable, and want support cuz this journey is too hard alone!